Sanity as defined by dictionary.com is the state of being sane or soundness of mind. I ask you, who with a three month old has any mind left, much less a sane one. I'm hoping I will find it again one day but I highly doubt that will be the case. We are currently in the middle of our daily afternoon screaming session. This will often end with her vomiting followed by hiccups...which of course makes her scream again. The process also often ends in a few tears on momma's part as well. But we get through it.
I truly thought that I would thoroughly dislike being a mother. In my mind, before she was born, I saw it as a job without pay. One that is all consuming and without a break. It's not a job you can quit or take a vacation from. It is 24 hours a day 7 days a week for the rest of your life. That is perhaps a bit callous but none the less the truth. What I have discovered the last few weeks is how much fun it can be. When my daughter smiled at me for the first time my heart melted. Since then it has been a round of smiles, laughter, tears, and her tiny little baby snores. Nothing makes me happier then when she looks at me and her whole face breaks into a smile. Not just her mouth but the edges of her eyes turn up and she throws her arms in the air. There is nothing quite like pure joy on the face of one so innocent.
I would certainly never say that there aren't hard days mixed in with the fantastic. My daughter and I (and my entourage of pets) came to visit my parents near DC while my husband is deployed. Within a day or two of getting here, my little one started screaming and crying in obvious pain. I could not figure out what was wrong or what to do for her. She had not acted like this before, she was normally such a happy baby. Her typically small cries for attention were now piercing and shrill and little tears streaked down her cheeks. What was wrong with my baby? How could I help her? Luckily my mother and sister were on hand and after trying a few things, we discovered the little one had terrible gas. We all know how much gas built up in your system can hurt. After a slippery trip down to the drug store (we had recently had a fairly heavy snow) we were able to relieve her pain and she slipped into a nice nap. It just shows now matter how wonderful your child (and I know my girl is very well behaved and happy) there are still going to be some of "those" days.
I am just grateful that my child is such a happy, loving, and bright baby. Be thankful for what you have even if you never knew that you wanted it in the first place.
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